Bye for now

Linguistic schizophrenia

It’s been more than five months since I graduated from high school (for the second and last time) which happened to coincide with me stopping studying french. Temporarily, of course, but still. I’ve come to miss it more than I imagined, mostly because I for starters thought I was going to spend this fall in France and not in Gothenburg. But since things turned out the way they did and I haven’t had the time to spend with the language that sometimes seems a more natural measure of expression than my mother tongue, the withdrawal symptoms have come upon me.

It’s not that I try to show off or be pretentious or poetic or anything along those lines, it’s rather a question of what language comes to mind and what suits the situation best. Lately it has to an increasing extent been the above mentioned language. It’ll just seem more natural to put something in a french expression than in any other possible way. The way that I vent this is through constant scribbling on one of the various note pads or books that I make sure to carry with me in order to ease the urge that is ever so prominent. There is a guy in my course who spent most of his life in France and so I have the bad habit of starting a conversation with him in french rather than in swedish. He must think I’m the most stupid person he ever met. And it is a bad habit, considering it excludes all the others, since most of the ones that did study french didn’t do it with the same intensity as we did at my school.

I think a trip would be soothening. The problem is, there is too few free weekends ahead that allow me to do such things. Maybe after my exam in mid-january, but that seems too far a way at the moment. I mean, if I could, I would leave tomorrow morning without even thinking twice. But I already checked – the flights are all sold out…

Newsflash

I haven’t fully been enjoying studying medicine and this is mostly because of the fact that I don’t consider it help my personal development. I want to study things that makes me question my opinion, that help me realise things that change the way I lead my life, that challenge my way of reasoning.

Yesterday I realise that I actually do get all of this out of studying medicine, only in a much more subtle and niched way than I imagined.

So, it’s all good.

Suddenly everything became great

Today I had the last day of uni for pretty much a week ahead.

Isaac’s here visiting, it’s the best.

We got access to Voddler a couple of days ago.

I ran out of things to worry about.

 

So yeah, things are going good.

Disorientation

There are too many and too few things happening at the moment.

Soothing

I went to a Poetry Slam seession last night to change focus from aching knees and today’s test. It was the best thing I’ve done in a long time. “Balm for the soul” is a swedish expression which corresponds quite well to how good I felt afterwards.

Articulatio genus bilateral failure

My knees have raised a mutiny against me.

The left one is the ringleader and the right one is too much of a sheep to take stand against its twin. Now I can neither move nor remain still without being remembered of their strike by the chronic pain radiating out from around the patellae. The only time it doesn’t hurt is when the leg is entirely stretched out which excludes all activity except for lying down or standing upright, putting weight on the other leg. That is, after the five first minutes when I rubbed the intense cramps away, it doesn’t hurt lying down.

I bought myself nice shoes which I assumed my knees would approve of. Real shoes, no classic canvas ones, the real deal. They were expensive and I figured since they were proper shoes they couldn’t cause me any pain what so ever. I don’t know what happened after that, but now it hurts so badly using them. And even if I don’t, I’m still in pain.

It’s taking over my head, please take it away.

When all else fails, consult Youtube.

The past week of lectures has been frustrating. Not because what we study is difficult, but because the lecturer refuses to present the topics in a way that is accessible to someone who hasn’t studied these things before. My spontaneous reaction was to ignore the fact that I wasn’t following to a 100%, I figured I would be fine with almost understanding from what I studied in Chem and Bio at VCE. Believe it or not, what I was taught down under has given me a head start. Pretty cool.

Anyway, my strategy of volountary ignorance was doomed to fail but it wasn’t until yesterday that it struck me that I wasn’t keeping up to the extent that I have to. And I will blame this on the lecturer. I wouldn’t be surprised if he feels a little better about himself over knowing something that we cannot understand. It’s as if he considers it prestigious to be smarter than the rest of us. Someone should tell him he’s a lecturer, damn it. He could find an outlet for such unsympathetic fetishes at some mutual admiration society and stop abusing the poor medicine students who depend on his ability to make things easy to understand.

So I gave up on hoping he would change and put my faith in the textbook instead. That worked for about 20 minutes before I realised none of the page references are correct because I don’t have the latest edition. Fark, no wonder I couldn’t find the answers to the Hemoglobin homework sheet in chapter 7. In the latest edition, that chapter is called, voilà, Hemoglobin. In my book, chapter 7 has the headline Exploring Evolution. (rimshot) And no, the index is not helping.

It was not until I stumbled across a lecture series from an Indian university on Youtube, after a peer posted it on someone’s facebook wall as a joke, that things started making sense.

They have the best lecturer. She makes things understandable. With people like her around, I don’t understand how guys like above mentioned can keep their jobs.

From now on, Youtube will be where I begin to look. I might even ditch our lectures for the Indian equivalent.

I guess this means I could quit uni and start browsing Youtube as my way of obtaining wisdom. I think it would actually work.

Noctural reflections

The good thing about people thinking you’re ~24 is that you get into clubs that are 20+ without even showing your ID.

The downside is that you get hit on by people who are 30+ when all you want them to do is piss off.

I still don’t get why my age being 24 is such a common guess.

Post-exam plans

I can’t wait for tomorrow when I finally is to get started on accomplishing on the post-exam to-do list that I’ve put together for the past week. Now that I finally am to get my life back, hopefully in serviceable condition, there are so many things that I want to do. All starting tomorrow. I wonder if it will bring me the amount of pleasance as I’ve imagined. Probably not, my expectations are immense.